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How do others perceive you?

“I am not who you think I am; I am not who I think I am; I am who I think you think I am ”

― Thomas Cooley, Inscriptions: Prairie Poetry

How do you see me? How will you describe me in three words? Ever asked these questions to a loved one or a friend? Well to begin with you should not let other people’s perception of you undermine your self-belief. People see us with their own glasses of upbringing, life experiences and so much more.

However, I happened to ask this question to someone. My friend replied that he would describe himself as Talkative, Like-able and Humble. Then when the same question was asked to me I used the words Alone, Flowing and Evolving. Wow, that was brutally honest and way too deep (awkward laugh). This made, yours truly to start a social experiment where I asked my readers and friends to describe me.

The results are hilarious. You can read for yourself.

But where are we going with this intrigue of other’s perception of us?

To start with you could authentically ask how you see yourself. This is a journaling exercise that makes you think more feel more and show up more authentically. Are you becoming somebody you have always wanted to be or is the society and social media turning you into someone you do not recognize?

Another perspective

‘You don’t know me’ by David Klass is the story of an adolescent who goes crazy when he realizes that no one really knows him. Who you think as ‘you’ only exists in your mind. Who the other person thinks as ‘you’ is not completely the real you. It is mind-blowing and also sad that no one really knows or understands us fully. There are different versions of us living in the minds of different people at different times.

An excerpt from my journal

“Humans see what they want to see.”
― Rick Riordan, The Lightning Thief

Walking alone, slaying my dragons and pity partying I have reached so far. But, I wanted to go way ahead and do more and be more. So I see myself as not enough and not doing enough. However, it made me realize that the journey ahead has made me so self-critical that I might have forgotten how much I have accomplished so far. Time to re-read Reverse Bucket List

Seeing that these amazing bloggers and entrepreneurs out there see me as a sensible, compassionate and inspiring person has made me soften towards myself. Now, this in no way shows you that you need outer validation to feel confident. Trust me when I say all you need is inner validation and inner fire to accomplish all your dreams. But, if you are feeling a little extra harsh about yourself and need another person’s perspective, go to those people who have seen your journey and have been part of it at least partly.

When you hear them talk about all those times you failed and picked up yourself and kept going, you will see the parts in you that are resilient, forgiving and hard working. We all have darkness and light in us. The question is “Where are you focusing?” Are you giving so much importance to the darkness in you that you are diminishing your own light?

“Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change.”
― Wayne W. Dyer

Since that conversation and my social experiment, I have so much more compassion towards myself and renewed excitement in my journey. I have seen some of you post ‘describe me in 3 words’ as your story and I am excited to see what this experiment will bring into your life.

Always remember that no one has the right to judge you especially based on the chapter they just entered into. No one knows you or your journey as well as you do. No one has ever walked in your shoes and on your path. Your journey is unique, beautiful and all yours. If you lose sight of how far you have come a few uplifting words from your loved ones could make all the difference. That is all that I have learned from this entire experience.

“Because one believes in oneself, one doesn’t try to convince others. Because one is content with oneself, one doesn’t need others’ approval. Because one accepts oneself, the whole world accepts him or her.”
― Lao Tzu

Thank you for all your responses. I appreciate your contribution to this blog post.

So go ahead and genuinely uplift a friend as these times really call for positivity. Stay safe, stay indoors and stay blessed!


  1. It is a beautiful post. Enlightenment is what I would say is my take away from it.

    • Udit Udit

      Well written and interesting!

      • Soumya Midhun Soumya Midhun

        Thank you 🙂 It is truly mind-blowing that many versions of us exist in the minds of others while we perceive ourselves in a completely different light.

    • Soumya Midhun Soumya Midhun

      Thank you so much, Alisha for your comment and your participation in the social experiment. I am so glad this post has inspired you and I hope it does the same for everyone who reads it <3

  2. Udit Udit

    That’s an interesting take on other’s perception!

    • Soumya Midhun Soumya Midhun

      Thank you, Udit. I am grateful for your participation in the experiment 🙂

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