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Stressed Out


The music is loud. Oh wait, Shaurya’s crying is louder. His throat infection episode is getting so difficult. My head is about to explode and the song is giving me some kind of agony that I can’t even verbalize.

It is Twenty one Pilots – Stressed Out going on its 100th repeat. One part of me wants to turn it off but, I just don’t really want to I guess.

“My name’s Blurryface and I care what you think”

Those lines just elucidate my current situation. It never mattered to me a few years back what people thought about me. But, now my quarter life crisis is kicking in and I am in a rat race that I don’t even understand much about. Well wait, who enrolled me in it anyways?

It was so easy in the fairytales. The Prince and Cinderella had a beautiful ever after. But, now, I realize that ever after comes with a catch. The world we live in today is so fast paced than ever before and the need to hurry to a nowhere is not helping this already tired mommy who wants to do a lot.

 “So when are you going back to work?”

“You just have one kid and you think you know all about motherhood that you started blogging about it?”

“Goodness me your son eats chocolate and ice-cream?”

“Why are you not putting him in a play school and going for work?”

“Where are you guys planning to buy a house and settle down?”

“You are totally wasting your education by being a Stay At Home Mom!!”

“I thought you were ambitious and bright. So disappointed to see you sitting at home all day long”

“You have not potty trained him yet?” SHOCKED!!

It is like the society knows what I should do with my life more than I do. While my son is recovering from his throat infection and while I feel terrible about having to give him antibiotics, people think I could do things way better?

So the right thing to do is leave my tiny Shaurya in some stranger’s care so that I can earn? Make him wait until evening for his mom’s hugs and kisses? Say no to hot home cooked meals for my son so that my education won’t be wasted? I mean how does education get wasted in any case? Who came up with this concept anyways?

I have absolute respect for working mothers but, I despise the society that wants to judge a woman’s choice of giving up on her career journey temporarily for being a Stay At Home Mom. A woman who earned prior to her becoming a full time home maker, goes through phases of low self-esteem, missing own income and financial freedom and that agony is something she does not share with everyone. I go through that phase on a regular basis but, I wanted to do what was best for my son and for us as a family. My education benefits my son the most and this blog is a reality because of the same education.

I feel the societal pressure to be an impeccable woman but, I feel if I give in and fake perfection then, I am making it so much more difficult for Shaurya to live a happy and honest-to-himself kind of life. Keeping it real requires a lot of courage though.

He is sleeping on my lap while I pray for strength to be a good mother. Never knew growing up meant wearing masks of happiness and perfection that made others feel bad about their own lives. The song is comforting me as I feel the burdens of adulthood.

Wish we could turn back time, to the good old days,

When our momma sang us to sleep but now we’re stressed out.

We’re stressed out.”



  1. Whatever you do it’s never good enough for others.
    So do whatever you want to do, not what you have to do 🙂

    • Soumya Midhun Soumya Midhun

      Absolutely Swathi 🙂

  2. Awesome post 🙂 sorry I know it is about stress, but loved it alot. Especially all the questions that you mentioned above. 🙂

    I agree it is totally a mother’s decision when she wants to work or whether she wants to work or not? Don’t know why sometime everyone is so interested in others life?

    Anyway, how is Shaurya doing now? Take care.

    • Soumya Midhun Soumya Midhun

      Thank you so much Alisha 🙂 he is recovering slowly

  3. Amazing post Soumya. Totally shows how stressed out you are…. Am in your boat 😀

    • Soumya Midhun Soumya Midhun

      This phase will be over hopefully 🙂

  4. Heart poured out in words…this is a phase and you are a strong women…you have taken a decision to stay at home and take care of your baby and no one has right to judge you on that…this will pass and these moments with your baby will live lifetime in your memory 🙂 enjoy the phase..

    • Soumya Midhun Soumya Midhun

      So true Anu..Thank you ma darling 🙂

  5. Miss Sweet & Chic Miss Sweet & Chic

    Awww you are a wonderful & beautiful mom inside & out! Remember always live for no one but yourself & you’re family! Don’t give a damn what others think, being true to yourself is what’s important. You are a great & adorable momma 🙂 Xoxoxo

    • Soumya Midhun Soumya Midhun

      You are always so encouraging my supermommy frnd <3 Absolutely agree with you xoxoxo

  6. Amazing post.. 🙂 It is way too easy for the world to judge you and criticize you for what you do… be it none of their business then.. Leaving a full time career for any reason needs courage. Being dependent on other members when you were the bread earner once does pinch. But end of the day it is your life. Your son is your responsibility and decisions about his upbringing should be whole and sole your decision. You have inspired me to write a post about my situation. Thanks for sharing. Lots of love to you and Shaurya.

    • Soumya Midhun Soumya Midhun

      So glad I could inspire you Deevya. Cant wait to read your post 🙂 xoxo

  7. You are so pretty 🙂 Great post though!

    • Soumya Midhun Soumya Midhun

      Thank you Ritu 🙂

  8. Great post Soumya! And all I could say is I feel you! I see me here, I have had these thoughts too, I have it every now and then. But people criticize, let them do it as long as you are happy nothing else matters. The people who asked these questions maybe forget that one out of the world pleasure we feel when our lil ones smile,give hugs and kisses, said the first word, took the first step and many more milestones, which flee treasure! You are a great mom soumya 😘

    • Soumya Midhun Soumya Midhun

      Absolutely Husna. We will never regret that we missed out on our lil onez infancy or toddler hood and that is a blessing! You keep going strong mommy!

  9. Soumya I literally have stopped thinking what people are going to say about me.It is my life and its none of their business to interfere in my life.So do whatever you want to do man.Keep smiling dear.☺

    • Soumya Midhun Soumya Midhun

      Haha tat salman khan dialogue thou. Way to go Yamini love that attitude 🙂

  10. OMG this is totally what my sis in law tells me everytime I meet her. She has left her high paying job for her son and neigbours are judging here the same way. She tries to be strong but I know Inside she is shattered, tired and sleep-driven. I respect all of you wonderful women who give it all for the sake of their baby. I wish I am that strong soumya when I have my baby although the society aunty keeps telling me that I am more career oriented and not planning a baby and that I am over aged for that. LOL. See the irony that the same society is telling you that you are wasting your education and same society is telling me that I am giving my education lot of importance. I guess peple just have to say something so that they can feel less depressive about there lives. You are doing great honey and no one has an iota of right to tell you anything about how you should raise your son.

    Lots of love :*

    • Soumya Midhun Soumya Midhun

      I totally get it Megha. When a woman gives up her career for her baby the society calls her weak and a loser. On the other hand, when you are a working mother they say how unemotional she is and poor baby etc. Megha keep in mind that you should become a mom when you are mentally and physically ready for it. May I also add financially ready too. It is a full time and lifetime commitment babes. Lotsa love and we all know you are gonna be an amazing and strong mommy.

  11. Reshma Reshma

    Amazing post dear!! Well said and cant agree more!!

    • Soumya Midhun Soumya Midhun

      Thank you Babes 🙂

  12. Amazing post hun… loved going thru’ it and thoroughly enjoyed reading it…
    xoxo, neha

    • Soumya Midhun Soumya Midhun

      Thank you Neha

  13. Oh! same here yaa 🙁 I can totally relate to your situation, Soumya. We just celebrated our first anniversary and relatives are forcing me to have a baby!! I face the same above mentioned questions by them, why I am not joining any job and if not,then why I am not planning for a baby! What the….!!!! I always try to ignore as it disturbs me a lot which I can’t explain. I just answer them, I would do whatever I feel great, my rule 🙂 🙂
    Shaurya,get well soon baby :* 🙂

    • Soumya Midhun Soumya Midhun

      Thank you Anamika. I am so glad you are aware of what makes you happy as most of us get drowned in the societal pressure and lose touch with ourselves. More power to you gurl 🙂

  14. Soumya i do the same as you did above… with a green tea of a cup and rest is …….

    • Soumya Midhun Soumya Midhun


  15. babe..forget about the world..Just believe in yourself and breathe out …Everything will be fine

    • Soumya Midhun Soumya Midhun


  16. Nice post dear. I think working or not working is your personal choice. No one has the right to judge you on it and if they are judging then let them do that. Just stop caring and be what you want to be.

    • Soumya Midhun Soumya Midhun

      Hopefully this article inspired other women to make the right decisions. Thank you Nausheen 🙂

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